Farwell My Cornhollio
by Shadow Pumpkinhead
Summary: Set after the series finale of Beavis and Butt-head and before Daria's series, Daria and her family leave Highland to Lawndale. But, will Daria miss Beavis and Butt-Head?
1. Chapter 1

Farwell, My Cornollio

By

Patrick Moore

Daria Morgendorffer looked at the slacker teens of Highland High, as she sighed in their disgrace. For the past few years there, she learned that most teen will become idiots or worse.

She turned to two teenagers who were grunting and laughing, as the teen on the left picked his nose with his finger. He wore a Metalica shirt, and short red pants. She could see the braces on his teeth covered with remains of nachos. Butt-Head just laughed.

"You two are worthless," said Daria to Beavis and Butt-Head.

"Who asked you, Diarrhea?" laughed Butt-Head.

"And, I wonder why you two won't get any," sighed the cynic. "I just wanted to tell you cretins that next week will be my last day here in Highland High."

"Are you going to score?" Beavis asked.

"No, butt munch, Daria's pregnant," corrected Butt-Head.

"What?!" Daria spoke in shock. "I'm leaving Highland, stupid. My family is moving to some place called Lawndale. Didn't Mr. Van Dreisen tell you yesterday?"

Beavis and Butt-Head just glared into space.

"Never mind," said Daria.

"Listen up, slackers," said Mr. Buzzcut, as he entered the classroom. "You morons should know that our own Daria Morgendorffer is leaving us next week. I want you peons to give respect to Daria, as she and her bimbo of a sister move away from you idiots as soon as possible. That includes you, Beavis and Butt-Head."

"My sister isn't a bimbo, you Lee R. Remy want to be," Daria gritted her teeth under her breath. "The sooner I leave, the soon I'm away from that jackass drill sergeant."

Daria frowned at what Buzzcut called her, like moron and idiot. She could have stood up at Buzzcut, but she didn't. She vision that Buzzcut was roasting in Hell with the other evil people like Hitler and Stalin.

"Daria!" Buzzcut shouted, as Daria woke up from space. "Why don't you tell the class about next week's party in your honor, when you leave us?"

"Look, I don't feel like talking right now, Mr. Buzzcut," said Daria.

"Very well then, Ms. Morgendorffer," replied Buzzcut, as he turned to the class. "Time for a pop quiz, you little brats!"

Daria just sat there, as Buzzcut passed the quiz papers around. She could have told Buzz cut a thing or two, but she just sat there doing nothing.

"Daria, I want to talk to you after school," said Buzzcut.

"So you can insult my intelligence some more?" Daria asked.

"Just meet me after school, Ms. Morgendorffer," replied the teacher.

"Diarrhea's in trouble," said Butt-Head.

"Diarrhea Cha-Cha-Cha," replied Beavis.

"Shut the hell up, you nitwits," said Daria, as she began writing on her quiz paper

To Be Continued…


	2. Chapter 2

At lunchtime, Daria ate a cheeseburger that she got from Burger World yesterday, because she didn't want to eat what the lunch ladies had cooked up. She looked at one of the lunch ladies serving bad macaroni and cheese, with a cigarette still in her mouth. This made Daria sick to her stomach.

The cynical teen took out some fries, and squirted lots of ketchup on them. It was better than taking her father's homemade lasagna with her to school everyday.

"Is this seat taken?" Daria turned to see her sister, Quinn, standing there with a lunch tray with a bowl of salad, and a can of diet soda. Quinn wanted to watch her weight anyway.

"Sure," Daria replied, as Quinn took the empty seat. "What the hell do you want?"

"Daria, can't I talk to my own sister about stuff?" Quinn asked. "It's about the move to Lawndale next week. Do you think it's a good thing to leave Highland?"

"Quinn, every teen here is a moron with no plans on getting a good job," said Daria. "At least Lawndale won't have the same teenage idiots there as here in Highland."

"Are you going to miss Beavis and Butt-Head?" Quinn asked again, but Daria said nothing, as she ate her sandwich.

"Those two imbeciles don't know the difference between evolution and God," replied Daria, as she drank her soda. "All I know it that those two idiots are too stupid to think for themselves."

"Now that you've mention it, I have been think about them, ever since they got back from Washington," said Quinn.

"If you haven't noticed, Quinn, they got Mr. Van Dresien and Mr. Anderson arrested thanks to that," corrected Daria. "Now, let's change the subject here." Daria bit into one of her fries.

Just then, Beavis and Butt-Head walked towards the two Morgendorffer sisters, with trays filled with tacos and nachos. The two idiots just laughed, as Daria just sighed.

"What do you dimwits want?" Daria asked the two of them, with her usual deadpan look on her face.

"Want to watch the Steven Segal triple feature, baby?" said Butt-Head. "They'll be chicks and booze."

"And lots of blood and guts," continued Beavis, as Butt-Head slapped him in the face.

"Shut up, ass wipe, I'm trying to score with Daria," said Butt-Head.

"Get bent, you losers," said Daria, as she continued eating her lunch.

"I think I better get going," said Quinn, as she walked off.

Butt-Head slapped Beavis again. "Dammit, Beavis, you made Quinn go away. Now we got to deal with Diarrhea."

As the two numbskulls turned back to Daria, she was gone. Beavis and Butt-Head just laughed.

As school ended for the day, Daria walked into Mr. Buzzcut's classroom to see the teacher and a very familiar woman with long, brown, curly hair sitting and talking to each other.

"Aunt Amy, what are you doing here?" Daria asked her favorite aunt.

"Your mom couldn't make it, so she told me to go in her place," said Aunt Amy. "Mr. Buzzcut has been telling me about you and your grades here at Highland High, and I'm proud of you, Daria."

"Daria, you've been one of my best and competent students in my class, unlike those other bastards who don't get any work done in my class," said Buzzcut.

"What did I do?" Daria asked.

"You didn't do nothing, sweetie," said Aunt Amy. "But, Mr. Buzzcut has a favor to ask of you."

"Here it comes," Daria rolled her eyes.

"I want you to be a tutor for the next few days to the most incompetent slackers here in my class," replied Buzzcut.

"And who are the idiots I have to tutor to?" Daria asked.

Buzzcut just smirked. "Take a wild guess."

Daria gave a shocked look to her face, as she heard the familiar laughter coming into the classroom. She turned to see no other than Beavis and Butt-Head behind her.

"Daria, meet your students," Buzzcut just chuckled.

Daria just fainted to the floor.

To be Continued….


End file.
